to my blog, Connect thru Love. My postings will be about changing the parenting paradigm from consequences and control, which do NOT, I believe, have long term effects on behavior, to a love based teaching/living model. And what i appreciate most about this model, even from my very right-brained perspective, is that it is based on neuroscience and what and how the brain processes experiences. And though I am a therapist, when I work with families who are encountering difficult behaviors in their children, I am an educator and a coach to the parents.
I invite you to not only read, but to comment and ask questions regarding behaviors you are encountering with your children. And if you are a teacher, counselor/therapist, or case manager, I would love to hear from you as well.
To ask a question, please email me atconnecthrulove@gmail.com or simply post it in the comment section.
10 week Parenting Series: Beyond Consequences, Logic and Control
Coaching/Therapy Specialties: 1. Children with difficult behaviors 2. Reactive Attachment Disorder 3. Foster children 4. Pre and Post Adoption 5. Trauma issues
I am available to do phone coaching/therapy as well as office or home-based therapy.
I have been a social worker for 31 years. My work has been with families and children first in the area of Child Protective Services and then as a therapist working with the same population. I have worked with divorcing and divorced parents teaching co-parenting techniques, supervised therapists and have been a social worker for emotionally challenged children and adolescents in an inner city school system. About 7 years ago I was introduced to the work of Bryan Post and, as a friend and colleague said at the time...I went Post-al. All of my previous assumptions and indeed my work using behavioral interventions, got pushed aside. And along came the realization that none of the interventions, meant to change behaviors, had anything in common with helping children heal from the trauma they had experienced. My best work these days is as a coach/consultant for parents, other caregivers, and teachers.
The services I provide are parent education, coaching, consulting and supervising.
I am the mother of five adult children and grandmother to five. I am both a bio mom and an adoptive mom.
I had raised my children on Theodore Dreikur's model of logical consequences and had tallied up many, many hours of therapy with parents using the logical intervention of behavior modification. I worked in a school program that promoted the positive earning of points for the ultimate reward of moving out of an alternative school setting. About 7 years ago, I was introduced to the Stress Model and a new parenting paradigm. Bryan Post, PhD and Heather Forbes, LCSW, wrote a book called "Beyond Consequences, Logic and Control" and when I fortuitously stumbled on their work I sat and read it through in one sitting and have re-read, dog-eared and given away copies of the book ever since. And I have devoured their materials and have taken training from them both. I am a Certified Trainer in the Beyond Logic and Consequences parenting model. The theories have a solid foundation in brain research. I never cared to hear about brain research...I was too right brained to be interested, let alone understand. However, it has truly become my mantra that "if I had known then, what I know now" my own family's life who have been so much different, as would my clients' lives. I am comforted by the fact that as short a time as 15 years ago, little of this information was available and it certainly wasn't available to the mainstream where it could have stemmed the tide of disrupted placements, both foster and adoptive. I am committed to getting the message of this parenting model to as many parents and educators as I possibly can.
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I really look forward to both your questions and comments.