10 year old reacts as if she is 2

Question:
I have a 10 year old daughter who sometimes seems like she is 10 going on 20 and other times like she is 10 going on 2. Her teachers tell me she is very bright. However, when emotionally challenged or when stress arises, she behaves very much like a tantruming toddler. I would like to understand so that I can help her.

Answer:
I have no doubt that your daughter is very bright and at times very mature. When she acts like she is two, she is telling you that she is stressed and she needs help regulating, calming, and returning to a place of equilibrium. We know that "when we stress, we regress." Behavior is our way of communicating; your daughter is telling you that she needs you, just as she did when she was two. She needs you to move in to her, to perhaps hold her and let her know she is safe, because that moment of stress that throws her back to being a toddler, and she does not feel safe. I do not know your daughter's history, but her behavior indicates that perhaps there may have been some trauma history. I will talk soon on what exactly is trauma.